The Marvelous Crumb

Follow Joy. Find Belonging.

December Is A Full Moon

You haven’t felt yet.
Give them time.
they are almost here.
Nayyirah Waheed

Moon in Scorpio
Mercury retrograde
The holidays

Do you feel it? The river of tender knowings under the surface?

Monday’s supermoon shined into my room and stirred me from a deep sleep. Its cool glow reflected off the faces of the framed gurus who top my shrine and landed somewhere in my being.  My eyes opened, confused. Is there a light on? No, it’s the moon. I sat up to see it directly, but the angle was wrong. Too cold to get out of bed, I fell back to my warm sheets and soon that space between sense and nonsense.

December is a Full Moon

And this is what December is, isn’t it? A beckoning full moon that both deepens our connection to the unseen AND distracts us from this time for going in?

I feel myself slipping readily into the nonverbal. I want to sleep. I want to eat. I want to read. I want to lounge about. I want to drop all commitments and just be with all that’s being stirred — sort it out, understand, put myself back in the driver’s seat. And yet, this stirring is due in some part to all the ways I’m being drawn out.  To attend. To give. To Complete. To know. To Plan.

You feeling it, too?

December is a Surfboard

Rather than letting this tension be an unraveling, I’m playing with accepting this push and pull like the moon’s effects on the tides. I can fight the opening and closing or I can realize the futility of this and respect the necessity of both of these energies. When I notice one beginning to override the other, moments of going under, feeling the pounding immensity on my back, when it’s too much and it’s not enough, I can adjust, get back on the board and keep riding. There’s some trust in both the intensity and frivolousness of it all.

December is a Do-si-Do

We can welcome this dance with light and shadow, doing and not doing, depth and superficiality, work and play, internal and external, sense and nonsense.

We are designed for this two step — to twirl in the in-between. December gives us moment after potent moment to get familiar with the steps.

My niece the dancer in her favorite boots.


We may have a desire to find balance between our internal and external worlds but so often, espeically this time of year, the external (commitments, plans, projects) takes over.  Inviting moments to pause and breath is one small thing you can do anytime, anywhere to  come back to yourself.

Try it out.

Take a deep breath and let it out with a long sigh. Now, do it again. Throw your head back and let your whole body have that sigh. Really let it out. How do you feel? Try doing this throughout your day. I’ve found sighing to be helpful before, during and after:

Long Conversations
Holiday Shopping
Riding Public Transit
Driving In Traffic

Where else? Help me add to this list by commenting below.




  1. Love this Kelsey! You have beautiful written my feelings. I am currently hiding in my bedroom while listening to my children tear apart my house downstairs. I will enjoy a big deep sigh (maybe 2-3) and then tackle and even embrace caring for my children and house. Thank you!!

    • Kelsey

      December 8, 2017 at 5:29 pm

      Michelle! I’m just imagining your kids tearing through your lovely home. Chaos and joy all rolled into one. Taking a deep breath for you. It’s sooooo nice to hear from you. <3

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